You Know, I Did It As A Joke

Barry Obama, Peace Be Upon Him, recently said he'd been the author of the Stimulus Package that went into effect over the summer. He was so instrumental, in fact, that he didn't even show up to vote on the measure, as he's been campaigning for President for about 2/3 of his Senate career (which is almost as much as Joe Biden has-badum-ching! Hey, remember Joe Biden?). If I was still doing the "Claim of the Day," this would be a good one to chalk up.

But why is it like this with Dems? Can't they just talk without the grandiose posturing and fact-stretching? Whether it was Misadventures on a Helicopter (Hil-Rod and Biden), Inventing the Internet, Christmas in Cambodia, or the numerous whoppers that the Golden Boy has served up, they all seem to want to be such a part of history that they write themselves in when there's no need to.

Obama is no different. He said his parents were brought together by the March on Selma-except he was 4 when it happened. Then there was the bill his Banking Committee authored...except he's not on the Senate Banking Committee. Kennedy and Kruschev had tea and crumpets and prevented WWIII...except the meeting actually made the Cuban Missile Crisis worse. The Berlin Wall was brought down by people working together (I suppose as long as he's talking about Ronald Reagan, George HW Bush, Margaret Thatcher, and Pope John Paul II, he's right).

It's a pathological need of Dems, one that I can't understand. Of course, most of them don't really understand history, so what can you expect when they invent their own?

Its True: Barry Has Learned From Clinton

Barry told us earlier in the week, when describing how tough he was to subsist on hotel food for eighteen months, that because he'd gone up against Hilary Clinton in the primaries, that he was experienced.

And apparently he's learned from Hil-Rod, who once claimed to have inquired about joining the Marines in her youth (I hear you laughing out there. C'mon, she was serious! Honest!). The Messiah told George Steph today that he thought about joining the military in his youth.

(This is also the same interview where he talked about his "Muslim faith." Way to stop those secret Muslim rumors, Barry. I'm waiting for the inevitable blaming of the campaign staffer.)

I'd make a joke about the Clintons teaching him how to break his political opponents legs, like his surrogates have tried to do to Governor Palin, but he is tied up with those savery Chicago characters like Tony Rezko, Saddam's cousin, the Ayers-Dorhn clan, and the cast of thousands that is his church. He didn't need the Clintons to learn how to be a legbreaker.

The Wheels on The Bus

The latest casualty of the Obama International Bus Tour is none other than rapper Ludacris, whom the Bus-Drivin' Messiah had met with and had discussions about 'empowering youth' in late 2006.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15972471/

A recent bit of poetry from the Sage of the Dirty South:

Said I handled his biz and I'm one of his favorite rappers

Well give Luda a special pardon if I'm ever in the slammer

Better yet put him in office, make me your vice president

Hillary hated on you, so that b**** is irrelevant

The Bus-Drivin' Messiah's flack today retorted:

This song is not only outrageously offensive to Senator Clinton, Reverend Jackson, Senator McCain, and President Bush, it is offensive to all of us who are trying to raise our children with the values we hold dear. While Ludacris is a talented individual he should be ashamed of these lyrics.

Ah, that's the Barry we all know and love: A guy whose use for someone extends only as far as their usefulness to him. The wheels on the bus, once again, go round and round. I believe, Luda, you'll find Mrs. Dunham, Rev. Wright, Trinity Church, 2/3 of the Veep selection committee, several advisors...ah, you get it.

Obama Speaks...

And nobody in the Democrat party listens, apparently.

George McClellan, I mean, Wes Clark, was the seventh Democrat to question McCain's service and experience yesterday. Today, Obama security advisor Rand Beers became the eighth to do so (HT: Jim Geraghty, National Review).

Barry, I hope your surrogates change their evil ways (see, I can be for hope and change too!).

Either this is another case of the Secular Messiah saying one thing and doing another (Wright, Pfleger, et al) or nobody on his side really wants to listen to him. Even after he declared McCain's service out of bounds, his people were still doing that. Oh, well, I hear the bus revving up-you better get ready to join Grandma, the Reverend, and the Church.

It's funny, almost, and Jim really hit the nail on the head when he called it "Good cop, Bad cop" by Obama. Though you have to wonder-how many more advisors does he have to disavow before people get tired of it? There've already been a number of them-Samantha Power, for one, who quit after calling Hilary Clinton a monster.

Here's my question-how can we expect this guy to make all those dictators he's promised to meet unconditionally with listen to him, when he can't get the people he pays to?

Which Senator Said That?

“Lord, if only I could have talked with Hitler, all this might have been avoided.”

If you said Barack Obama, Hilary Clinton, Joe Biden, or even Chuck Hagel, you'd be wrong, but you'd know that. It was the quote used today by President Bush as he addressed the Israeli Knesset in Jerusalem, discussing appeasement and the idea that all we need to do for there to be peace in the world is simply to talk to our enemies. It's an appropriate quotation, since so many of us believe that if we meet face to face with those whose stated desire is the destruction of our country and its way of life, they'll change their mind and love us.

Neville Chamberlain was had at Munich, and the entire world knows it. You can probably see the piece of paper that Hitler and Mussolini signed somewhere in the British or French archives (it's probably not on display in, say, the Czech Republic or Poland). People who are fanatics, Churchill observed, will never change their mind or the subject. And so it is with those who desire your death, destruction, or subjugation. You would think that Jimmy Carter would have learned that after the Soviets duped him on Afghanistan. Is it any different today? Apparently so, as all that stands between us and peace in our time is cowboy diplomacy.

The quote, by the way, was Idaho Republican Senator William Borah, an isolationist, made in 1939, as recorded in William K. Hutchinson's book Borah, 1961. Hutchinson records it made in a conversation with Borah. Apparently, Borah held himself in the same high regard as today's Congress does itself. Would that the rest of us felt the same, eh?

What Language Are They Speaking, Mr. Foreign Policy Ace?

Remember a few weeks back when Senator Obama said that he was more qualified as a foreign policty expert than Sens. McCain or Clinton because of his extensive world travels, including a trip to Pakistan in the '80s during spring break, and his visits to family in Africa?

So tell me, constant readers, what language do they speak in Iraq? If you guessed Iraqi, you are wrong, and probably don't know the difference between the guy from Bombay and the one from Baghdad. They speak Arabic. At least our foreign policy expert knows that.

However, if you asked what language they speak in Afghanistan, and said Arabic, you'd be wrong, too. Afghans (and Iranians, and Pakistanis, and Indonesians, and all sorts of other 'Stans and various other Asian countries) don't speak Arabic as a first language. Afghans speak several languages, the most common being Dari Persian and Pashto (Persian is as close to a universal language there as you'll get).

But Mr. Foreign Policy Expert believes that we're wasting resources in Iraq, and one of those is Arabic translators to talk to the locals.

Naturally, the Obama loving press (but I repeat myself) has covered for him, saying he intended this to mean talking to foreign fighters in Afghanistan, which everyone knows is the legit War on Terror. But...who will talk to all the Syrians, Egyptians, Palestinians, and Saudis in Iraq who do speak Arabic if we put them in Afghanistan?

Foreign Policy expert indeed. I guess that trip to Pakistan was insightful. I guess that's why you want thousands of our boys to spend some time there in lovely Waziristan. Of course, they won't be spending just a week, huh?

Casting Call!

So, with the selection process coming to a close-or being pushed that way by the media-what's say we go ahead and cast this years' candidates in A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the White House?

Will Smith as Barry Messiah:


Theresa Randle as Michelle Obama:


Bill Cobbs as Jeremiah Wright:


Amy Poehler (who else?) as Hill-Rod:


Dennis Quaid as Bill Clinton:


Clark Gregg as Mike Huckabee:


Bruce Campbell (and Bruce Campbell's Chin!) as Mitt Romney:


Tom Cruise as John Edwards:


Ian McDiarmid as Ron Paul:


James Woods as Rudy Giuliani:


Jeff Bridges as Joe Biden:


George Lopez as Bill Richardson:


Ron Perlman as Mike Gravel:


Dylan Baker as Sam Brownback:


Fred Thompson as...Fred Thompson:


And, of course, as John McCain, Michael Hogan, who pretty much plays John McCain on Battlestar Galactica (tortured by enemies, hot wife, third-generation military):

When I Awoke This Morning

I lay in bed, vainly hitting the alarm's snooze button, clinging bitterly to my Bible in my right hand and my .357 in the left, and gleefully smiling at the thought that the Democratic party process has continued to bless us with weeks-hopefully months-more of the unintentional comedy that is Senators Barry Messiah and Hilary! Clinton. Thank you, Pennsylvania. I shall eat Quaker Oats this evening in your honor.